Breaking: Harrison Butker Signs $10 Million Deal with ABC for a New Show, “It’s Going to Replace The View”

A famous football kicker got everyone scratching their heads. Well, yes, the ABC Network has given Kansas City Chiefs kicker Harrison Butker a huge $10 million deal to host a new talk show. We may be missing a TV host who is an expert in kicking footballs but not brains.

No wonder if the American Democrats are behind this move. As we all know, they’re always talking about “kicking” things—kicking the can down the road, kicking the ball into the end zone of progress, kicking the Republicans out of office—maybe they figured, why not kick the traditional TV hosting model out the window too?

Perhaps they might be trying to appeal to Middle America, you know, the folks who love football, and… well, that’s about it. It’s a clever plot, really—get a football player to host a talk show, and suddenly, you’ve got a whole new demographic tuning in. Next thing you know, they’ll be nominating Tom Brady for president!

Fun fact: maybe this is the new American dream. Forget about becoming a doctor, lawyer, or tech mogul. Kids, start working on those field goals! Apparently, booting a ball through the uprights is the ticket to unimaginable wealth.

Breaking: Harrison Butker Signs $10 Million Deal with ABC for a New Show, “It’s Going to Replace The View”